Victories, Defeat, and Depression

20 Apr Victories, Defeat, and Depression

If I could be transparent with you, right now — I’d say everything, life as we currently know it really feels surreal to me.

When the quarantine started, I was in a season where my body just really needed rest, and above all, I just felt blessed to be able to stay home with my folks for a while.

And if I’m to be completely honest, while everyone (supposedly) has turned into a productivity maven, I’m just trying to keep it together most days, in between homeschool, preparing meals, zoom calls, deliverables, and trying to stay whole and present in moments. I’m cycling in between shock, empathy, and just overall gratefulness.

I’m not working out 2 hours a day because I still work 8-9 hours a day, and honestly, it’s probably longer because of the constant interruptions.

And I’m ashamed to say it, but – also, I’m not spending more time with God.

Well – if you know me personally, then you know that when I’m emotionally beat, I find it comforting to listen to YouTube sermons. This week, while I was listening to an old message from Pastor Steven Furtick, I was encouraged to study 2 Kings and Elisha’s defeat of the Syrian army. But — then I started thinking about Elisha’s mentor, Elijah.

There are so many similarities and lessons between them. I’m telling you, it’s wild.

So – let’s talk victories, defeat, and depression.

Because this story is so long, we’re going to break it up into two parts.

Let’s talk about a mentor and his mentee.

THE MENTOR

A tremendous man of God.

These are just some of his witnessed miracles and victories.

1) Causing the rain to cease for 3 1/2 years and being fed bread and meat by the ravens (1Ki 17:1-4).

2) The miracle of the barrel of flour and jar of oil and the resurrection of the widow’s son (1Ki 17:14-22).

3) The calling of fire from heaven on the altar bringing glory to God in the face of 850 false prophets (1Ki 18:38-40).

4) Ending the drought (1Ki 18:45).

Wouldn’t you think a man with so much power and such a good relationship with God would continually rejoice when so many great things have happened to him?

Don’t you think that he would be full of life and passion?

But, that’s not the truth, nor is it a reality. And because Elijah was human, he also experienced defeat and depression.

Although his victories were huge, and the miracles he witnessed, extraordinary. It was the defeat that happened after the miracle that put him into a low place, under a broom tree, pleading with God, “It is enough! Now, O Lord, take away my life, for I am not better than my fathers.”

Exhausted, physically and emotionally – he fell asleep.

While he was sleeping, an angel touched Elijah and told him to “arise and eat.” Looking around, Elijah saw a cake of bread and a jar of water. Elijah ate and drank, then laid down again. The angel came back a second time, touched Elijah, and said, “Arise and eat, because the journey is too much for you” (1 King 19:7). Elijah rose, ate, and drank. Strengthened by the food, Elijah traveled 40 days and nights until he reached Mount Horab (the place where God gave Moses the 10 Commandments).

There, Elijah went into a cave to sleep. But God spoke to him and said: “What are you doing here, Elijah?” Elijah answered: “The Israelites have broken their promise to you. They destroyed your altars and killed your prophets. Now they are trying to kill me, too.”

God tells him: “Go and stand on the mountain.” First, a powerful wind blew past the cave. Next, there was an earthquake and then a fire. Finally, Elijah heard a calm, low voice. He covers his face with his coat and stands outside the cave. And then God asks again why he ran away. Elijah says: “I’m the only one left.”

God then says, “You are not alone….. “

“Go back the way you came and then head for the Desert of Damascus…..”

It’s at this moment that we realize five things:

1) God sends angels to minister to you to help renew your strength.

2) God meets you where you are.

3) God is quiet.

4) God will give you instruction when you’re ready, and your focus is on Him and the things concerning Him.

5) God wants you to fight for yourself and others.

Women of Judah, even winners, get scared! But, please take heart in knowing that God doesn’t leave his children, and He won’t leave you there.

In this season of uncertainty, if the loss of a loved one or the balancing act of homeschool and work leaves you in tears every day, then know that nothing is wrong with you – this is just a hard season.

It is my sincere hope that you won’t get caught up in the trap of ‘what was’ or anyone’s productivity contest.

Be more intentional in finding peace throughout the day, resting, or just “being.”

At this point in the story, Elijah is well-rested and has spoken with God.

His situation is still crazy, and the queen still wants him dead, but now — he has been renewed and has an assignment.

I know that we don’t have a broom tree or a holy mountain to run to in our moments of uncertainty and despair, but we do have peace. When Jesus gave his life for us, we received the Holy Spirit and God’s peace. In John 14, Jesus says, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled, and do not be afraid.”

Feelings of fear, anger, overwhelm, exhaustion, sadness, and grief can stop us from seeing what is right in front of us.

Sis, it’s those feelings that can stop us from seeing that God is with us, and sometimes, He is present in the sound of sweet silence.